Saturday, May 24, 2014

I will fight for you


5 years ago when I was In hopelessness You promised me this, and today after all that time You still continue to fight for me. Whenever I look at this verse I am reminded of Your love, Your presence and that intimate moment You reminded me that You are still in control. 

To all you amazing people reading this? Whatever situation you may be in right now, it may not seem like it at all but He is fighting for you, and when you get past this phase and look back at it, there will be such strength in your heart because you will realize He actually carried you through :) Don't lose heart!

“Be strong. Take courage. Don’t be intimidated. Don’t give them a second thought because God, your God, is striding ahead of you. He’s right there with you. He won’t let you down; he won’t leave you.” (Deuteronomy 31:6 MSG)

My life is not perfect but I am in love with a perfect Father who keeps fighting for me in every situation.

Ps: He fights for you too :) you have all the reason to smile through it now. 

All my love 
Crystal 

Saturday, May 17, 2014

So, is it about you or is it about Me?

There I was tonight all ready and excited to sing for Hillsong Asian..rehearsal had gone great and I managed to come in on my part correctly, and I was pumped to just go for it, And then it happened..

The moment it was time for me to come in, I literally just FROZE..I'm not kidding, I knew when I was supposed to come in and I was going to but I didn't!! Thank God James (our MD) came to the rescue and brought me back into it. 

So as worship went on, as I do, I began beating myself up!! "How can I make a silly mistake like that?" " it was okay during rehearsal". Just so you know, all this went on while I was worshipping !! 

Almost immediately He spoke in my heart. Is this worship session about me or is it about you? Are you on this platform so people can see how perfect you are or so they can look past your perfections to my grace and kindness. 

Right there I just surrendered my heart once again n allowed Him to deal with me. Now that I think about it I'm so glad that this happened tonight.. It helped me grow, learn and completely depend on Him. 

I'm writing this tonight so we will not forget why we do what we do as a worship and creative team. Always check your heart and motives before you step up on that platform. There can only be one superstar and it is most definately not us. So step aside and remain faceless, remain invisible so He can shine.. So He can touch and change people's lives through us. 

I'll leave you with a question. Are you ready to be invisible? Or is your worship just purely gratifying your personhood and ego..like I always say ALL HE WANTS IS YOUR HEART.

All my love
Crystal

Thursday, May 15, 2014

As a worship leader we should be forgotten.



copied and pasted this article to my blog because firstly it is amazing and secondly it makes so much sense to all worship and creative team members..I hope it blesses you immensely;

It was a typical Sunday morning at a church that was like any other in the USA. People meandered through the front doors and were greeted by warm smiles and the smell of brewing coffee. Music played in the background while small talk filled the atrium with the sound of activity. Parents called to their children as they ran up the stairs towards brightly colored rooms and happy smiling teachers. It was Sunday morning and everything was ready. 

Joe walked in with a smile on his face but it was a poor attempt at masking the pain he felt inside. Joe was your average guy with a couple of kids, a job that he didn't really like (but it paid the bills) and a marriage he was bored with. He medicated the pain of an unfulfilled life with TV on weeknights and sports on weekends. 

His kids fought each other every day and his wife nagged him about his absentee fathering and his growing abdomen. 

Joe's life was full of noise from the moment he woke up to the time he fell asleep. Constant, unceasing, relentless noise on every side. 

Joe, the bills are due. Joe, your kids are out of control. Joe, your wife is miserable and lonely. Joe your boss needs you to work overtime this week. Joe, you are a failure at life. 

This particular Sunday morning, Joe had wandering into church, the place where everybody is happy and he felt like a hypocrite. In that last week, Joe never picked up his Bible, never prayed, never felt God's presence or heard God's voice. All he heard was the noise of his life and he wondered if there would ever be any respite from all the chaos. 

He made his way into the auditorium and found a place to sit. He knew a few faces here and there and he halfheartedly waved at some friends he had known for years. Eventually his wife made her way to sit beside him after checking the kids into childcare. 

They had made it to church. Now they waited for the music to begin. They waited for the ritual to commence. Joe wasn't even sure why he was there. Perhaps today, however, in this place of worship things could change. 

The worship leader stepped on stage and walked to the microphone. Joe looked up and for a moment let the facade slip as he allowed the pain to rise to the surface. 

Quietly, Joe whispered. 

"God, I don't have much to bring, but I'm here. Help me, speak to me..." 

As a worship pastor at an A-typical American church in Roseville, CA, I have seen Joe many times. I have stared into his eyes as I wandered on stage and stepped up to the microphone. I have looked beyond the facade and seen the pain of a mundane life and the vacancy in his eyes. 

I know the sound of the constant noise Joe hears because I have heard it in my own life at times. 

I have three small children and overwhelming bills each month. I have the many years of feeling like a failure because "success" in the music industry evaded me no matter how hard I tried. 

I know the sound of that noise and how it drowns out the voice of God in my life. 

But here I am. It's Sunday morning and I step up to the microphone looking into the eyes of hundreds of Joes, each on of them fighting their own battles. I have a list of songs to sing and a band ready to play. I am ready to do the job I was asked to do. 

And then I hear His voice. 

Not Joe's, not my own. His. The voice of the One that spoke the world into existence. The voice of the One who calmed the storm and eased the fear of the disciples. The voice of the One who said, "I have overcome the world." 

It's not loud or aggressive, it's quiet and gentle. 

Quietly, he speaks to me. "They don't need to hear your voice, Ben. They need to hear mine." 

His voice. 

The Psalmist spoke about the voice of The Lord in Psalm 29. 

Joe doesn't need to hear my voice this morning. He needs to hear the voice of God, the voice that changes everything. 

I have only one job this morning. It's not to "wow" them with my talent. It's not to perform a flawless rendition of someone else's song. It's not to fulfill the "music/worship" part of the service. 

No, I am not here to add to the noise. My job is to create an environment so rich with the presence of God that all the noise ceases and the only thing that Joe can hear is "His" voice. 

Joe doesn't need to hear another song. Joe doesn't need to hear another sermon. Joe needs to hear the voice of the God who passionately, relentlessly pursues him. He needs to hear the voice of God. 

So today I have one job. It's not to be noticed, it's actually to be forgotten. To do my job so well that people walk away only with the remembrance of Jesus. 


It's easy at times to forget why we do what we do as worship leaders. 

There is the immediate need of providing a time of musical worship for a weekend service. There is the desire to present a certain type of quality and excellence that people have come to expect from worship times. We have the disadvantage of being compared to "professional" worship groups due to the proliferation of YouTube videos and live streaming. We wrestle with competing voices in our local churches that either love what we do or criticize what we do. 

But all of these things must take a back seat to the real reason for what we do. We are to provide a place where Joe can hear God's voice. 

I love the light. If I turn the light on in a dark room, the darkness is gone. It doesn't fight it, it doesn't complain about it, it doesn't wrestle for control. It is gone. 

When we lift up our voices in worship, we are turning on the light. We create an atmosphere where darkness has no place. The noise ceases. Joe now has an opportunity to hear the voice of God. 

I don't have control over how Joe responds to that voice, I am just trying to give him an opportunity to hear it. It might be the only chance he has all week to hear God's voice in his life. This 30 minutes of singing may be the only time that things get quiet enough in Joe's life that he can actually listen. 

The last thing I want to do is distract Joe from hearing God's voice. But often we do. In fact, I fear we are becoming too distracting. 

I am all for great lighting, interesting video, quality sound and dynamic worship. I am all for interesting songs and creative musicianship. The moment that it becomes a distraction, however, I want to burn it all to the ground. 

We are not on stage to be remembered. We are on stage to be forgotten. All we are required to do create a place that Joe can hear God's voice and then get the heck out of the way. In the jostling for position that far too often happens among worship leaders, I want to challenge you to do what Jesus asked us to do. 

"He sat down and called the twelve apostles. He told them, "Whoever wants to be the most important person must take the last place and be a servant to everyone else." Mark 9:35 

We have one job as worship leaders. To serve every Joe that walks in our doors and give him the chance to hear the voice of the God who loves him. We are not there to promote our songs or CDs. We are not there prove how skillful we are or how well we can imitate the latest worship hit. 

We are there to be forgotten.


All my love
Crystal

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Have my heart


That right there? It's what I love doing..my favorite thing in the world. I may not be phenomenal at it nor perfect. In fact I'm far from perfection. 

However, if you were to take away that mike in my hand, remove the musicians in the background, completely strip bare the lightings and tear down the platform, even if you took my voice away from me, I would still be in that posture. 

I love being intimate with my Master, I love singing so only He can hear my voice, I love lifting my hands in surrender, I love sharing my heart with Him and I love just completely and passionately falling in love with my creator.

If you are looking for the true meaning of worship? That is it right there. Caught myself placing more importance on everything else and losing sight of the one who loves me and longs for me. He captured my attention and drew me back to Him and said this clearly to me..

"Give me your heart because it is all I desire.. Give me your heart and everything you ever desire will slowly fall into place, I JUST WANT YOUR HEART."

Here miles and miles away from home, alone, I find myself totally and completely abandoned to His love, surrendered to His plan, and in total obedience to the call. 

I pray today as you read this, you will discover true worship for yourselves and the beauty of falling in love with your Master..

All my love 
Crystal 

Friday, May 9, 2014

It is okay to love


5 days ago I had the amazing privilege of having daddy here with me in Sydney and I wouldn't be telling the truth if I said I didn't enjoy myself. Walking hand in hand down the road, he asked me 

"Girl are you happy that I'm here?"

I looked at him with the most confused expression, which turned into the biggest smile and replied;

"Of course I am happy, I feel so confident when you are with me and beside me. I feel like I can conquer the world."

He just looked at me and laughed. 

As we spent time together chatting and sharing our hearts, I began to think of those who had no Father, the children who had to live without this role model in their lives, or the thought of having a father who was dysfunctional, or abusive. All at once my heart sank. I became silent.

Daddy wondered what was wrong but I just shrugged,and smiled placing my head on his shoulder. We sat there in silence for the next few minutes as I began to ponder. 

Suddenly the Holy Spirit began speaking to me saying, " It is okay for you to be happy. It is okay for you to love your daddy the way that you do, this relationship I have given you is not for you alone but you will share this love you have received and you will empower those who have no Fathers. I will give you the strength to show them the love you have immensely, and so freely received."

If you are reading today and have an amazing father. A role model you can look up to, that love is to be shared. But if you are struggling with your relationship with your dad/ parents, remember God is your father. He loves you more than you could ever imagine. He loves you more than any earthly Father ever could. Before you were born He fell deeply In love with you.

More than my earthly daddy I am deeply in love with my Heavenly Father. My prayer is that you will catch the revelation too.

Love you all